Nation On ‘Red Alert’ Over National Security Threat (SATIRE)

Pakistan Valentine's Day Celebration

Grave threat to the national security has been detected and nation is on ‘Red Alert’. The enemies of Pakistan and Islam have unleashed a weapon more powerful than HAARP and more widespread than American agents. What is this terrible evil we are facing? It is none other than…

VALENTINES DAY

Hindu-Zionist-Illuminati forces determined to destroy Islam are attempting to unleash this nefarious holiday dedicated to love and friendship on unsuspecting Pakistanis. Liberal Fascists are obviously supporting this shirk because it provides safe cover for them to express love of Hinduism. Thankfully we have the brave National Heroes who are not intimidated by these international forces of ‘love’ and ‘friendship’.

Pakistan ValentineProminent clerics have declared Valentine’s Day as un-Islamic, and government officials are not following their advise by banning the holiday.

Kohat Valentine's Day ban

Security forces like IJT will also be found carrying out security patrols to stop any attempts to carry out Valentine’s Day operations.

“I was discussing preparations for a class function with one of the girls when suddenly members of Shabaab-e-Milli dragged me to the ground and beat me up, rupturing my ear drum. The girl I was talking to was hit on the head and knocked unconscious.”

Since there is no threat from Daesh in Pakistan, and back-broken TTP is unable to carry out attacks in the country, the most serious threat faced by the country is obviously a holiday that promotes foreign values like love and friendship, which we are reminded have no place in this country.

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